“Ambitious” – A backhanded compliment

I’ve noticed lately that professionals have thrown the word “ambitious” at me. So I want to stop and breakdown this word that can evoke both positive and negative feelings for the recipient.

For example, I love Wale’s usage of the word “ambitious” in his poem, “Ambitious Girl,” off of his More About Nothing mixtape from 2010.

Wale envisions his “Ambitious Girl”

“Ambitious girl, your drive, drives me crazy…

…I’m in love with your business
And your productivity is the reason I interest,

Ambitious girl
See, I like the person that you are
But I’m in love with the person that you have potential to be
And all your dreams sharing with me
And your secrets baring with me
And the flaws, you ain’t even got to mention to me
Ambitious girl, you just wanna win, and you’d rather chase your dreams
Than to try to chase these men
That try to chase these skirts
That try to chase these shots with flavors that ain’t even as sweet as her
My ambitious girl,

I won’t forget you
I just reflect on how I ain’t met you, yet boo
You somewhere, getting your life in order
So for this time being, I hope this open scribe might support her
Support her, or work her, she worth it
Go girl [X3],

Ambition…

Wale’s poetry evokes a positive connotation when he uses “ambition” to describe a hard working woman he passionately admires, yet has not actually met.
However, long before Wale’s wooing of wondrous working women (ha, say that 5 times fast), traditionally the word “ambitious” was not used as a term of approbation.

Perhaps my earliest recollection of the word “ambitious” comes from Shakespeare. In the play Julius Caesar, Brutus accused Caesar of being “ambitious” and used it as his reason for murdering him.

“Et tu, Brute?”

Act 2, Scene 3

Brutus: “…but, as he was ambitious, I slew him. 

There is tears for his love; joy for his
fortune; honour for his valour; and death for his
ambition.”

….

Anthony : “The noble Brutus
Hath told you Caesar was ambitious:
If it were so, it was a grievous fault,
And grievously hath Caesar answer’d it.

Ambition, in this sense, is prideful, selfish, arrogant, and dangerous; basically, too much ambition can cause your downfall, and unfortunately in Caesar’s case it was said to have caused his untimely death.

Lets break this down…

A desire to succeed is usually encouraged. Young people are taught to “be all you can be,” and “reach for the stars” to achieve the American Dream.

Yet this is the same thing that tends to make people uncomfortable. There is something about an individual going above and beyond expectations and executing plans that actually have good chance of being successful that is, dare I say it, threatening for some people.

There is some type of hypocrisy deep within us that loves to see people to do well, but not so well above our preset expectations for them.

When an individual defies our expectations we have unconsciously set for them, we tend to respond with amazement or resentment. Sometimes it can be a combination of both. So when I received feedback saying that something I’m working on is

“incredibly ambitious.”

When I receive a backhanded compliment…

I process it in the same way as another back-handed compliment I’ve received many times in the past:

“you’re so articulate.”

This statement statement is analogous because on the surface it compliments one’s diction, grammar, and perhaps enunciation, while simultaneously announces one’s amazement for those abilities at a level that surpasses their preset beliefs about those abilities.

I submit that the prior statement is more harmful. (Not physically, because I mean, I am not familiar with anyone being murdered for their eloquence in a major literary work, like Caesar was for his ambition.) Rather, I’m saying, that by saying someone is “ambitious” could transmit as saying that the individual is “out of their league” and this can be extremely discouraging depending on the context. Furthermore, notably in certain contexts, that may be the original intent of using a phrase like this.

Needless to say that the negative usage of the word “ambitious” is more frequently applied to women than it is applied to men these days. In capitalistic America, ambition is useful for a man and even expected in most situations if he wants to succeed. Using the term to describe a woman is comparable to saying she’s too hard, too masculine, and not lady-like; basically, she has stepped way too far out of her expected role of being at the house in the kitchen. There are articles that discuss this gender – power difference, however I will not digress off in that direction. The same “out of your league” occurrence is also apparent for racial and ethnic minorities. Once again, I do not want to go there today. lol.

Without being too long winded about this topic of ambition, I will leave y’all with a few final thoughts.

I say all this to say that ultimately I do not think being called ambitious is insulting, unless it’s done by a friend named Brutus. If that’s the case, run! However, I do think it is important to pay close attention to the context of how the word is being used. If you are around a chocolate brotha with locs who says he wants to read you a poem, you’re in the clear and you should be flattered. But if you are in a school or work situation, you might want to take note of it and be mindful.

In any case, keep pushing forward!

The Microwave Generation

Most of my peers are college graduates or are about to finish school and enter the workforce. This can be a scary time full of uncertainty for young adults. We’ve all heard the stories about how difficult it is to secure a job in today’s society and a great deal of us are experiencing the arduous situation for ourselves.

However, another percentage of our generation does find jobs fresh out of undergrad. They are considered the lucky ones. Most of them are entry level and you’re expected to work your way up through the company. And as a young adult who just graduated within the past two years, we are tempted to find the 24 – 35k salary especially attractive. Think about it, you went from being a broke college kid to making a real salary and working in a real office. You know that “real world” that’s out there that people have been warning you about since you were in like the third grade. And hey it gets those pesky relatives off your back from asking you annoying questions like “What’s next for you?” and “How do you plan to put that degree to use?” That salary is more money than you ever earned working both those part time jobs you had in high school and undergrad so you are indeed content. You’re able to rent an apartment, buy a car, and pay your bills. You feel like the responsible adult you’re supposed to be and everyone is congratulating you. You are living the 20s life.

My issue is that these entry-level jobs lead to complacency. When you’re earning money you tend to spend more money on things like clothes, shoes, rent, cars, etc. And with these purchases comes debt and bills. These bills are obligations; therefore one must keep working to keep up with the cost of living. It is way too easy for one to develop a “paycheck to paycheck” lifestyle in this situation. This may be fine when you’re young but it’s not ideal to raise a family on this type of income. I commend these entry-level jobs for providing young adults with valuable full-time experience to move up in their companies or similar ones. But these positions can be very demanding and inhibiting for the young adult who desires more out of their life and career. If you’re working day in and day out you get comfortable. But how can you truly be comfortable in position where there is no job security, limited opportunities for growth, and hinders you from achieving your full potential?

If you are the type of person who envisions more for yourself, you may be like me and wrestle with the appeal of making the little bit of money from a job now vs. the salary and benefits that will eventually come with a career. Those of us who choose the latter choose to struggle longer.

We aren’t driving the new cars.

We aren’t splurging because it’s payday.

We are a tad bit envious of those who are, but ultimately we deny instant satisfaction for lasting gratification.

Most of our generation wants everything fast and easy. “That’s the problem with the ‘microwave generation’. Remember great food has been slowly marinated and thoroughly prepared to have the best taste.” So to those who emphasize with what I am saying and who choose to become entrepreneurs, attend grad or professional school, or simply choose the road less traveled, know that you are not alone.

Don’t settle, stay focused, and remain true to your goals.

You WILL get there.

And it will make all the difference.